Balancing Beams - Kith and Kin

Issue 67 April 2010

School friends, Batool and Hitoe liken their friendship to the yin and yang balance of the cosmic circle.  

Hitoe:

I met Batool at the start of secondary school in year seven. I was walking to school and saw her across the road. I think I only decided to approach her because she looked really meek and shy. I realised later how wrong I was! After we got talking, I realised that we went to the same primary school. As I got to know her better, I figured she was the total opposite of me. She is loud, strong minded and always speaks freely on issues whereas I’m definitely the more introverted, quiet type. However, her loud, honest nature has been known to get her into trouble! I’m always telling her how she needs to learn about balance and she quite rightly says the same thing to me. I guess we balance each other out; we’re like yin and yang. Batool is daring and adventurous and I love that about her. If she has a problem with something she does not keep it to herself, she addresses the issue head on. I’ve always admired that quality in her- the ability she has to confront problems without any hesitation. I always go to her when I have problems and she’s always ready to advise me. I know people often say that you don’t make your true friends until much later; once you’ve grown up and experienced the world a bit more but I know Batool and I will be friends for years to come. Of course we do have our ups and downs like all friends but I’ve always felt there’s something that binds us together. We have a deep-rooted understanding of each other as people which I don’t think will just go away. Our cultural and religious differences have never created any division between us; in fact, it’s brought a new level of understanding and appreciation to our relationship. We even encourage each other to pray as we’re both equally lazy! My fondest memory is when I once stayed over at Batool’s house, we were sitting on the top bunk bed and I was eating yoghurt. Something outside scared me so I shrieked and rolled back and ended up breaking the bed. I haven’t been round since and the yoghurt stain remains there to this day, I am told... 

Batool: 

First impressions most definitely last forever; after Hitoe first decided to speak to me on our way to school, she burst out laughing and that stayed with me. We call it her ‘helium, crazy laugh’.I distinctly remember recognising how unique Hitoe was when we met. She has a really great fashion sense that doesn’t involve following the latest ‘trends’ at all. She has her own style and she stays true to that, which is something I really admire about her. She’s not afraid to go against the tide and despite being quite introverted, she maintains her individuality. Hitoe has a really compassionate nature; she’ll go up to anyone who she thinks is upset and ask if they’re okay and if she can do anything to help. We’ve already planned out our future together. When we go to university, we are hoping to get a flat with some more of our friends, inshAllah. She’s so full of zest and life; I know she’ll make my university experience even better. I can’t say I’m unaware of our cultural and religious differences, but I don’t think it has an impact on us either way since we are both religious and believe in one God.  We have the same core values, which is what binds us together. We trust each other completely and I guess that’s what keeps our friendship strong. She knows she can come to me if she has any problems as I genuinely hate seeing her distressed. We play pranks on each other all the time. Although, she’d rather not recall the yoghurt story much! But we’re as bad as each other. I once called her house using ‘0800 Reverse’ as a joke and it’s safe to say that her sister was not impressed in the slightest. I didn’t call back for a week!Her originality and more importantly, her confidence in that originality is an admirable quality. These days, it’s so easy to just follow the crowd and do what other people in school are doing. But Hitoe really sets herself apart from others – she makes it cool to be yourself and I really appreciate that about her. She makes me feel comfortable and confident and I don’t think I have another friend like that.